Where Mom unleashes the inner monologue.

How I Keep My Sanity

on January 17, 2014

I think it’s time for a bit of lighthearted fun after all these serious posts.  Lately, my 3 week old has been having some colonic maladies.  The kid can’t go.  So naturally, in true baby fashion, he cries, a lot, when he needs to go and can’t.  Yesterday, I was trying to console him and keep my sanity at the same time.  I love to change words to songs to fit situations.  A lot of the time I do it without realizing it.  This happened yesterday while bouncing my son and humming.  Anyone that has seen the movie “Frozen” knows how much of an ear-worm the song “Let It Go” is.  I had listened to it earlier that day and it was stuck in my head ever since.  While consoling my son, I started changing the lyrics to help coerce my son to release the storm brewing in his colon.  Here are the lyrics, just for S’s & G’s:

The baby cries loudly in the house tonight
Not a poopie to be seen
A kingdom of constipation,
And it looks like I’m the Queen

The child is screaming because his swirling colon inside
Couldn’t get it out, heaven knows I tried

Just let them out, do more than pee
Be the good baby you always have to be
Its congealed, I feel, just let them flow
Please let it flow

Let it go, let it go
Don’t hold burps back anymore
Let it go, let it go
It’s ok to puke on the floor
I don’t care
What they’re going to say
Let the gas rage on,
The smell never bothered me anyway

It’s funny how some substance
Makes everything just smell

And the farts that once controlled you
All your cries tell

It’s time to see that you can poo
To test the limits of your diapers proof
No fight, no song, no room for pee
You’ll see

Let it go, let it go
I am tired of the constant cry
Let it go, let it go
I’d like to see you try

One day you’ll stand
Until then I’ll say
Let the gas rage on

Your odor flurries through the air into the ground
My nose is spiraling in dying cells all around
And one thought forms just like a smelly blast

You’ll lay on your back,
The gas is in the past

Let it go, let it go
And you’ll cry like a brand new fawn
Let it go, let it go
That perfect poo is gone

One day you’ll stand
Or at least sleep all day
Let the gas rage on,
The smell never bothered me anyway


So there you go.  Hope you enjoyed my moment of ultimate mom-dom.  I find that inserting humor into frustrating situations makes things bearable and this is one way I do that.  Besides, he stopped crying for a bit while I sang it, so it’s a win in my book.  PS- Smile!  It’s Friday!!!


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